3P) PAMPERED PETS
Holy wow, people do love their pets—Americans alone spend $41 billion a year on their pets! Apparently that’s more than what we spend on going to the movies, playing video games or listening to music combined. The typical dog owner spends $1400 a year. There’s been lots of stories in the news about pampered pooches like the local newscaster who’s been involved in a $40,000 custody battle…or the Israeli woman who recently purchased the entire business class section of an El Al flight from Paris to Israel so her beloved dog could sit next to her.
Click here to read about the custody battle over a pet Pug.
3P) WOULD YOU RATHER: LOTSA KIDS OR NONE
Steve is the king of impossible scenarios. Today he asked, “Would you rather have 13 children or never have any at all.”
What you said HERE
4P)OPP: IS SHE CHEATING?
A hard one today…how do you tell if she’s cheating, being groomed to cheat, or it’s just an innocent thing?
Yi Guys.
I never thought I’d be in the position of sending an OPP. I apologise for the foul language in this, you can clean it up where you see necessary. [Note: brackets are where we’ve changed the original language "Jarred" included.]
Ok so I have been seeing this girl (let’s call her Jenny) for 3 years now. I met her at work and we have a lot in common. Everything has been going great until recently. There is this other guy at work, we will call him Dave (not his name.) Dave thinks he is gods gift, he currently has three girlfriends (That I am sure of). In the past he has flat out told me that if he wants to sleep with a woman, if she is married or in a relationship, he doesn’t care. Dave is a grade ‘A’ [tool]. Recently Dave found out that I was planning on popping the question to my girlfriend. He all of a sudden became her best friend. They text back and forth and she won’t hide the fact that she they are talking but tries to keep it low key.
I drive for a living. The other day Jenny dropped me off at work. I had to swing by home to pick up some driver logs (paperwork) that I had forgotten from the night before but I couldn’t get in because my house keys are on my car key ring. So I started my route. By chance that day my route led me past Dave’s house. My car was parked in his driveway.
I finished my morning route with massive amounts of adrenaline pounding its way through my body, but I kept my cool. She picked me up when I got off.
“Hey, I swung by the house earlier. Where were you?” I asked.
“I had some shopping to do, I went to Walmart.” She replied.
“So how was Dave?” I asked.
She shot me a look of shock then looked at the steering wheel.
“Are you [having relations with] him?”
“No!”
I want desperately to believe her. One of my problems is she is very attractive (she’s like a 9) and I’m… Not… so I am very jealous (I know that I need to get over it.)
Earlier tonight we are watching a movie and at 8 she gets up and starts heading off. I asked her where she was going and she said that she was going to bed. So I get up and follow her. We both crawled into bed and killed the lights. I lay there for a while then open my eyes and see a blue light on the ceiling, I look over at her and she is texting someone. Without a word I rolled out of bed and came downstairs.
I don’t want her talking to Dave anymore, but I don’t want to be that asshole boyfriend who dictates who she can be friends with. I’m afraid that I might be reading too much into things. I don’t want my insecurities to ruin us, but I also don’t want to be the guy who is oblivious to his girlfriend running around on him.
What should I do?
Thanks for the time guys.
–Jarred
Do you have a feeling your boyfriend is cheating. Click here and take this quiz to find out.
WHITE TRASH NEWS FLASH
Ismail Sheikh recently lost his 18 year-old daughter in a card game. The Indian man put up his daughter as collateral after he lost all of his cash to a man named Mustafa. Ismail lost the next game and then watched as his daughter was dragged from his village. The police eventually went and retrieved the teen. Family members say Ismail has a drinking problem and is a compulsive gambler.
A Boston EMT is accused of shooting two of his friends after a night of drinking at a fund-raiser. He then grabbed his medical kit and helped to administer first aid. The 41 year-old EMT is accused of shooting two brothers during an argument after he was thrown out of the party. Both brothers are expected to survive, although one was in poor condition at a hospital after being shot in the chest.
LISTEN here.
5P) EMBARRASSING PARENTS
There’s an entire Twitter feed devoted to an embarrassing dad. It’s from a 29-year-old guy named Justin, and the Tweets are just the insane stuff that his grumpy, 73-year-old dad says. (Warning: Some of the language is not kid friendly, including the username.) But they make us giggle:
“The worst thing you can be is a liar….Okay fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2″
“I’m having a Makers Mark, you want one? What? 7up? I ain’t mixing f***ing makers with 7up. Might as well put a lil’ f***ing umbrella in it”
And then Robin Williams says he forgot to tell his daughter he does a nude scene in his new comedy, World’s Greatest Dad. “My daughter was at the premiere. She came up and said, ‘Thanks for telling me, dad.’ She’s 20 now and she was like, ‘Thanks for giving me a heads up about the nude scene!’”
Or Slacker’s dad who used to hand water the lawn in shorts and high socks…or worse, come to the door in his undies! My dad wore tighty-whities and didn’t care who was at the house when he felt like coming downstairs…
Here’s how your parents EMBARRASSED YOU
6P) SHOULD CHIVALRY DIE?
The jury seems to be out on chivalry. Women complain when guys aren’t thoughtful and don’t get them flowers, but others complain if a guy opens the door for her. How would you know which to do? Steve is a very very polite and extremely chivalrous kind of guy. He’s the kind of guy who stands up when a lady either leaves or enters the room or the table. But are his moves outdated? Should chivalry just die already?
We found a list of items that claim to be a surefire way to ruin a date. There’s only one way for sure: Ask the Alice ladies to vote!
CLICK HERE to see what they said.
And here’s the list:
#1.) ORDERING HER MEAL: This one’s just too old-school to survive feminism. It’s only cool if there’s a dish in another language, and you know how to pronounce it and she doesn’t.
#2.) LOSING ON PURPOSE: Whether it’s a game of pool out at a bar, or a game of “Scrabble” back at your place, don’t lose on purpose. “Letting” someone win is only OK if you’re playing a little kid. And your date does NOT want to be treated like a child.
#3.) PULLING OUT HER CHAIR: Helping a woman into her seat can work on special formal occasions, especially if it’s an older woman who CAN’T really do it herself. But most of the time, you can let this one go. You’ll just mess it up anyway.
#4.) CARRYING HER PURSE: Do I even need to explain this one? That’s what I thought.
#5.) ASKING HER DAD FOR HER HAND IN MARRIAGE: This one’s REALLY outdated. There aren’t too many women in 2009 who want two MEN to give HER the green light on who to marry.
Don’t involve parents when you pop the question. Because no one other than YOU should know that you’re going to make that move. That’s what makes it special. And involving parents in major stuff like that could set a bad precedent.
#6.) REFUSING TO LET HER PAY: This applies to the tip. If you’re paying for dinner, and she wants to do the tip, or get some drinks . . . agree. If she’s offering, take her up on it. She wouldn’t offer if she didn’t WANT to contribute to the night.
#7.) HELP HER PUT HER COAT ON: This is sort of like helping her sit: A nice gesture on rare, special occasions. But in general, it’s just so much easier to do by yourself. And it can be slightly awkward if the person can’t find their sleeve.
Do you think women killed chivalry? Click here to find out why some poeple think they did.
There’s a FOS (friend of show) who actually WANTS to lose his job. Ideally he’d like to get laid off so he can get severance pay but he’s okay with being fired too! He wants to know what he can you do that will guarantee a firing?
